I thought I was walking on my own, following my own path where you walked beside me on yours. I thought we were close enough to have our lives entwined but far enough apart to take our own steps.
But now I see.
Now I know that you walked ahead and I made my north star you.
I thought you supported my wonder, my need to keep my head facing the sky and the constellations. I thought you saw it all too, the beauty of the moon and her elegant balance of light and dark. I thought you saw that in me too and I thought you loved it.
But now I know.
Now I see that you only saw yourself and I mirrored the ideal back to you.
I thought you felt the electricity in your veins, the strive for growth and newness. I thought you longed to put your feet on new ground, your eyes on old buildings, and your mind in undiscovered terrain. I thought this was where our paths merged and our hands met.
But now I know it.
Now I am aware of the empty space that only grew, as you - and I - focused on you
I think I am changed. I think I have found my steady gait and my own path to walk. And I am no longer surprised to learn it is nowhere near yours.
But now I'm okay.
Now I know I'm better walking alone than pretending I'm walking with you.
